Showing posts with label free time. Show all posts
Showing posts with label free time. Show all posts

Friday, February 6, 2015

free time pondering

looking back I can tell that I have had a blog post almost daily. Do I have that much free time? I'm wondering how do I find time to blog when I have free time issues.
I don't do anything fast, so I am not sure if I am utilizing time well, regardless of my input/output. Bonk. I have moments of flow that hit the sluggish point that ruin the whole endeavor.
What's the point of blogging? I am mundane, so my audience puzzles me when I get little to none in form of criticism aside from the painful silence.
My blog is my means of flushing my brain of trivial thoughts and dissecting them. I need to vivisect my thoughts to be productive in proactive productive sense.
Nothing I write is truly serious, I'm afraid. If you are clued into my hashed out thoughts as being processed cynicism, I suppose it makes some semblance of the death of said thoughts. Once I became cynical on a subject, then I cease to feel passionate about it. Ambiguity, I embrace thee.
I feel like listening to Skinny Puppy.

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

hiatus of another sort

Still feeling sad about nt having a pc. Laptop and nook don't feel natural to me in that shifting is an after thought. Maybe myhands are failing me? They don't hurt or have numbness, yet they don't feel normal. I've my 6 month appt with fp in a month, might get a referral for the ct.
I need to refrain from garbage like overusing nook and laptop for they're stunting my flow of thought with an obsessive nature.
Still trying to figure out where I m in the big picture of things. I waste my  commodity  of time as though I am worthless.
Typing isn't enjoyable at the moment. I need to busy doing things though my mind is pondering what I wish I could be typing.
I look forward to dying for I know typing will be the least of my concerns, just gotta kill time with fun memories between now and my end, I guess.




Thursday, April 17, 2014

pain and other odd things

Something about getting six or more hours of rest seems to be the difference between today and yesterday. Sure my hands hurt and typing isn't smooth, but I don't have the burning between my shoulder blades, nor the void autopilot feeling in my head.

Having friends is a struggle for me. Being a social misfit/ social retard has amplified my idiosyncrasies into quirkiness that I am mostly oblivious. K has a lot of my traits, hence he's in Cub Scouts.

Scouting has been good for my interactions as well. Odd thing happened at the Pack Meeting last night in that a dad I speak to most often commented a) I was tan and b) I am "cut"

Felt awkward.

See, I don't get out much and I don't work out what-so-ever, hence the above is odd. Only explanation: a) On Sunday, I dug up and planted arborvitae while it was warm and sunny. b) I have a physically demanding job and I usually have layers on since we don't meet much during late spring and summer.

Though I seem to have a lot of free time, I don't allot it well to be doing fun stuff with the kids. It's been a long winter, hopefully I get into a better frame of mind and seize more days than let pass by, as the weather gets better and such.

Sunday, March 23, 2014

paid by the click


Ran across a piece by David Carr that amused me. Not sure why, but I started following him on Twitter @carr2n . I guess it's due to the sort of things he's interested in covering for the NYT: Media.

I get a few clicks a day here on this soon to be dead blog (stbdb), and Adsense seems to keep a tally of the pennies clicks upon the ads in the margins have generated for your humble owner of this stbdb.

I shall have ample time to pursue a number of neglected interests without this stbdb. I'm thinking of joining a church for the artificial extended family factor (google "Vonnegut and artificial extended family"), completing a novel, completing a memoir, writing my last will and testament, learning what my kids like doing aside from screen time, research my beliefs to see if my gut instinct is right, sleep better, eating better, being a better husband, and worrying about things, which I have control.

The last time I wrote down goals and accomplished them was when I was in solitude 20 years ago. I think I may have  the original list still, but also I think the purple notebook was acidic and vanished in to a spring-like coil. No tv, no music, and no English for a month left me to a lot of self-refection.

Sunday, January 5, 2014

Joy of Football

Didn't watch the Orange Bowl Friday. Totally forgot about it until the next day when we were at J's work as she tied up loose ends before officially starting maternity leave.

I watched one Buckeye Game all year, and I didn't watch all of it. I figure that I didn't waste 30 hours given the end result was a lousy 40-35 loss to ACC's Clemson Tigers.

B1G TEN is not much of a Conference, so nothing really matter until "post-season," and Urban Meyer is 0-2 there as a Buckeye Head Coach. Being 2-0 against the Team Up North, is meaningless, these days.

Anyways, I watched a single Steeler Game all year and they lost on Turkey Day. I watched parts of the Green Bay game as I was putting together a changing table, but that was just background noise. Was hoping they'd make the playoffs, but the KC Chiefs lost a game they should have won to the Chargers thus allowing the Chargers to gain the final seed.

Annoyed, I was hoping the Chargers would get a chance to end the Chiefs Post Season, but they didn't get a chance since KC CHOKED IN INDY! While the Chargers beat the higher seeded Cincinnati Bungles. I watched the latter game and thoroughly enjoyed the mistakes made by the ginger haired quarterback who gave the game away.

Doubt it will happen, but Marvin Lewis should be let go  much like Dusty Baker was let go by the Red Legs. Neither knows how to manage a winner in the post season in Cincy. Mike Zimmer has to be on somebody's radar to fill one of the vacancies made in the past week.

Only an idiot would take the Cleveland HC opening since it has been the downfall to any coach who has ventured there since the REAL BROWNS moved to Baltimore and won a couple Lombardi Trophies as the "Ravens."  Side note, Jim Tressel would be a great Browns Head Coach for he is a big fan of the PUNT.


Wednesday, December 25, 2013

too much free time

Not sure where my time goes, but I have a fair share of free time. I used to blog a bit in hopes of filling content that could lead to pageviews and thus revenue from AdSense clicks.  Nothing worthwhile came of the blah. I have moments when I review stuff I wrote and wonder about its origins. If I consumed alcohol or other mindbenders, I'd be better able to explain my lack of memory or the fact that I've had reoccurring thoughts that I never acted upon.

My wife is nine months pregnant with our third child, and I find myself thinking I don't remember being around doing the previous two pregnancies aside from conception and delivery. I have reasons for my aloofness, but they are silly. I was trying to not feel the pain I felt when we had a miscarriage.

I love my children and appreciate them more given that we suffered the loss. I am hardly the best I can be, and I have not settled for being a second rate husband and father, yet I have my blah days where I am on cruise control of selfish interests of isolation.

It's Christmas, and I can safely say my Christmases as an adult have been better than those I had prior to my meeting J. Life is too short not to appreciate each moment, yet I find myself reflecting here. I suppose that it could be worse, like playing video games, watching sports, or another mindless thing that is like empty caloric consumption.

Just a reminder to myself that blog entries should exist reflecting upon AAA tow truck drivers, ImproveIt repairmen, random mouse in the house, reconstituting the crib, Garmin GPS failure, Skinny Dip, Richard Zacks, FM/AM radio failure, Mazda5s, letter of apology from CENLAR, and seeing family after 5 years  as though nothing happened to cause an estrangement.

Last thought of tonight: When I was at work the other night, the kids there had skateboards. I remember when skating wasn't cool.  

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

364 days later

Today marks the last day of the year that has been ramblings and meanderings here. I remember 4/18/12 like yesterday. I was unhappy. Not as annoyed as I most recently was with Menards.
A number of uneventful things have occurred, but yet I can vividly recall such inane moments in time. Perhaps I shall revisit those stale posts and fix them into a certain standardization, if I feel inclined to do such things. The first 50 or so things were written in a manner to add original contact to get approval for an Adsense account. Probably won't since my spacial sense of time has gotten out of whack.

I woke up yesterday morning thinking it was Saturday.

I need to focus on the things that are important and to make them my priority. TV isn't going anywhere as I tell K with regards to DVDs and Netflix, same can be said for the clutternet.

New Year's resolutions should be season dependent and flexible throughout the year, even though they boil down to being the same vague notions that seem unobtainable to the likes of me. I just have to raise the bar and focus on the tasks and forget about the big picture like Mathew Scudder's AA meetings have taught me.

  • read more
  • manage time better with regards to priorities
  • engage with the family better
  • eat better
  • be more active
  • appreciate the little things and become at peace with the things beyond my control

Monday, April 15, 2013

Yard work Pt. II

There comes a point where grass and weeds seem to be intertwined that a $44 quote sounds reasonable. When I got a call about trying a different "local" lawn service without a contract,  I figured $44 is less than what I was paying, so I said "okay."

Sure it's a luxury, but so are Cub Scouts and swimming lessons. I can remind J of those costs whenever she starts talking about other projects.  Would be nice to be able to have a set budget and stick to it, but there's always going to be an unforeseen expense like a car repair or washing machine death that bears its ugly head during the month.

I need a real job or a second part-time job to get on top of things, but I have to contend with what I have first.

Clark Howard listed Cashcrate.com as a legit "work from home site."

 Cashcrate.com

I don't know if it's worth the effort, what do you think?

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Sunday, April 7, 2013

Yard work

Was in the yard Saturday pulling weeds. Fired the lawn guy because of the drought and the fact I was unemployed, thus making the luxury of a treated lawn seem silly.
Anyways, there are weeds in the yard in addition to brown spots where the grass died. J wants the lawn treated, but I'd just assume not pay for it when we have other priorities.
When we went on vacation to Disney, we couldn't afford it, but a promise was made that we'd go on a vacation. I don't regret going to Florida for the memories will last a lifetime, unlike our lawn which will require regular maintenance just for aesthetics that depend upon elements beyond our control.
It would probably be more expensive to be my own lawn man beyond merely cutting the grass, but with videos online, it's something to consider as an alternative.

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Wednesday, finally a day that starts before eleven.

It's 9am, and I'm up. B is now up and watching Bubble Guppies, but I was shaved before she did. Once I'm shaved, I'm not going back to sleep. I did get up on my own with a bit of a start, about 6 minutes before my alarm to get K ready went off. Had a weird dream feeling that I now can't recall, so I wasn't quite sleepy when I made sure K had his breakfast and lunch ready. Sure, I went back to bed, but I really don't need to be up until a half hour later. Besides, I can't stand watching SpongeBob. K always watches dvds in the morning, and I'm usually not in the mood. After my half-hour back in bed, I was more alert and shaved.

Monday, January 14, 2013

Reflecting upon the completion of Tom Jones

There are multiple editions of literary classics, thus completing one and boasting of achieving such a feat is a red-herring when throwing out page numbers read.

I completed Tom Jones this morning. I started reading it two weeks ago, but it hardly feels like so many days have passed. I don't know what some of the book means, but the main plot is straight forward enough in the conclusion that the 18th century double talk is not a complete barrier to unassisted understanding of the author's meaning and/or intent.

Regardless, I am at liberty to start another item that I have yet to complete form my days in college, but I'm not sure I will at the moment. I need to read something different and that wasn't forced on me like Willa Cather.

I bought How to Win Friends and to Influence Others from Half Price Books because a former boss had once attempted to read it. The edition I bought also had How to Stop Worrying & Start Living, and I never felt compelled to read it until now.

Friday, December 7, 2012

Disney and Netflix

Read the other day that Netflix bought license rights to Disney movies starting in 2016, but what caught my eye was that Disney vaults stuff would be available NOW. Sure enough, we have access to things we didn't the day before, which is cool. Then again, stuff is still rather dated no matter how timeless Disney movies can be.

Monday, September 17, 2012

Living Well in a Down Economy

Going to the dentist is a pain to some, but I like going for it gives me a chance to talk with people.

Our regular hygienist has two girls  and a husband that has been between jobs a bit. Her husband has a temp job now but its 90 miles away. Rather than commuting daily, he has an apartment.

This situation is a scenario J and I have discussed. You do what you have to do, and sometimes situations makes sense to change your mindset.

Just being open-minded doesn't mean an opportunity will present itself.

Just have to stay positive and think about the things that we have control over.

In the grand scheme of things, happiness is obtainable if you want to be happy. Worrying gives rise to preparation, but worrying for the sake of worrying is senseless. If Plan A doesn't work then go with Plan B. As long as contingency plans are based on reality and are goal oriented towards the same general result then progress will happen regardless of the small episodes of failure along the way through the process of elimination.

Is there a fate worse than death? Worrying about such things surely ranks up there, which makes me wonder why there are atheists in the world. I puzzle about a number of things, but I don't worry about them enough to desire reasons based on whimsy. Regardless of the causality, things happen for a reason, and I try to go in the direction I am meant to go. Situations present themselves and circumstances dictate which path I follow. Dumb luck happens, but preparation helps nudge one to be in the right place at the right time. It's easy to regret decisions in hindsight, but regret is wasted energy unless a lesson is learned.

Monday, August 27, 2012

Inbox purge galore

I have had a couple dozen or so e-mail accounts over the years. I use quite a few regularly. 1) I have my original school address from '96 that I was allowed to keep upon graduation as a gift, but can't use as my primary address. 2) I have my original yahoo account which I set up in '97. 3) I have a iwon.com account that I set up in hopes of winning something back when that domain existed as a search hub that I now use as a spam account. 4) I have my graduate school address, that I use when I want to seem less anonymous. 5) I have my ISP address. 6) I have a gmail account. 7) I have a "work" email as well.

I could have soooo many twitter accounts, but why would I do that? Back when I was young and full of ideas, I thought it would cool to create interactive extrapolations of characters to a book I was writing to give a ready made audience upon its publication. I developed the idea before social media boomed when things like collegeclub.com existed. The idea fizzled when I had other things that were prioritized thus left to be never followed though since it was tedious and ill fated given that I was basically spamming acquaintances with assumed names in hopes of getting a conversation going through those infamous forwards that you tell something about yourself and pass along like a chain letter. Not sure if trolls existed then, but it was of that same nature of antagonizing banter to generate a persona based on semi-fictional reactions. I needed dialogue and lacked a sense of character depth to think originally. Blogs didn't exist then, since Livejournal.com and Diaryland.com were years away to be able to appropriate others' thoughts. Very tedious endeavor it was.

Do chain letters still exist?

Anyways, I have a lot of email accounts that I use daily for things, when I could get by with just one since I forward most of my mail to one account. I have my accounts set up to forward copies, so that I have full inboxes when I only rely upon one account for any extended period of time. I cleaned out several thousand email from a few account yesterday. I wonder how long it will be before they are cluttered again.

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Rethinking Target Pharmacy

Disclaimer: I worked at Target at one point in my life.

For whatever reason, I have been to Target to pick up medications twice in the past week only to have to wait though they were called/faxed in hours before my coming to pick up.

I have a regular script I have refilled every 90 days, that I called in on Friday morning last week.
Supposedly, it would have been ready for pickup at 2pm that day, but I didn't get over there until Saturday.
They changed their hours since the remodeling for a produce section, so the pharmacy closed before I came to pick up.
Sorry, but 5 o'clock is early, even on a Saturday.
I made sure that I got there before 5 on Sunday, but my script wasn't ready. I had to wait a few moments for it to be filled.
A couple days ago, K had a visit to a specialist regarding issues he's had since December. Nothing seemed evident upon the doctor visit so blood work was ordered in addition to another test. Doctor sent a script for K that would help his current matters, but we were told to wait until the tests were ruled upon.
Got a call this morning at 9:15 about the blood work which showed nothing out of norm, but the second matter's results weren't in, yet. Those results were relayed at 2pm, and they were positive, so a different script was called in at our Target Pharmacy.
I was going to go to Target before J got home, but I changed my mind upon considering the last time I had K and B at Target. B wanted a toy and was not nice about leaving the toy aisle. I didn't want to relive the episode with it being a day fresh, so I waited until we had eaten dinner to go alone.
I head over there after 6, and they only had the original script ready. I said the other was called in around 2, and I was told they didn't have it in the system. The technician needed to check their voice mail.
It came via fax, and I had to wait a half hour for it to be filled.
Only half of the script was available so I didn't have to pay for it until I got the second half. I paid upfront, for I had a coupon for a $10 gift card since I was filling a new script there. The coupon expired before I needed to fill the second half of the script, and I could use $10 to off set the cost.

I like Target. I like our pharmacists at Target. I just don't care for the waiting and early closing hours.

One thing I do like, we were able to refill a script while we were in Florida without having the medication with us.

I'll stay with Target Rx for now, but there are a ton of pharmacies around that could do just as well if not better.

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Don't forget your Pepsi when you go to Holiday World

A few weeks ago, J and K were watching PBS show a series on amusement parks. They featured a park called Holiday World that was in Santa Claus, Indiana. Not sure why, but they were intrigued, and they thought it a good idea to go there this summer.

We went today. Spent most of the time in the water park portion, so I didn't take any low quality pics or vids.

No one likes roller coasters in the family but me, while everyone likes water play, but me. The kids had a good time, so I won't say anything bad. I especially can't complain about the price of admission.

Check out their site. They don't charge for PARKING! They have a FREE PEPSI oasis almost every twenty yards. They have FREE sunscreen as well. Ample places to relieve oneself after drinking a gallon of Pepsi, Dr. Pepper, Sierra Mist, Gatorade, or other Pepsi friendly product.

Admission was discounted with the presentation of a PEPSI can. Family of four admission cost less than $150. Only had to pay for food, carny games, and souvenirs.

  • Food stands were mostly outdoors, which sucked with the heat index being over 100 degrees.
  • Food selection indoors was limited. They didn't have chicken! Burgers, Pizza, and hotdogs were what they pigeonhole you into liking. But beverages are essentially FREE. I had rancid coffee, but only a person like myself would drink coffee when it's 100 out side.
  • They had build your own stuffed animals! So we had to get a Penguin and a Poodle, since the carny games were rigged thus making those stuffed animals unattainable.

Kids had fun, but wanted to go home rather than stay another day ( adding a second day was a very reasonable option that could have been decide upon leaving for the day). We got home around 11:40 tonight. We left around 7:30 in the morning, so it made for a long day. It's almost a four hour drive, but it's in a different timezone, so we gained an hour of fun!

Holiday World, a place in the middle of nowhere that is great for kids like mine.

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Wednesday the Fourth

Centerville has Americana Festival on the Fourth, and we have gone to it the past few years. They have TONS of things to do for the kids, and there are always tons of people there on a very warm day.



Today was mid-90s and sunny, so swim suits were worn for the trip to the festival seeing that Centerville has a sprinkler park in the proximity of the kids fun area of the festival.


Kids got their hair and faces painted.




Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Having a blah day

Not saying I am bored or anything, but I've been feeling less than motivated of late. Could be I'm neglecting to take my vitamins regularly, or my thyroid is not happy with me. Who knows?

Dogs days of June, I guess. Baseball season has been filled with ups and downs, and I'm a junky. I can't give it up. I can give up Camels and Bass, but following well compensated athletes, I can't.

Something wrong with following sports when there's much more that is actually important to be accomplished.

I guess that all commercials placed during sporting events are dead giveaways as frivolous wastes of personal income for anyone watching such things knows how to waste time and money to be "entertained" without giving a second thought.

I gave up tv in that I feel no desire to watch things that eventually are available on DVD.

Just have to figure out how to stop being consumed by the radio and internet time bandit. If I sleep through such things, they will still happen without my needing to know about them when they occur. Infovegan concepts transferred towards productive activities that have gainful results beyond the lull of blah when the fix of following a winner doesn't manifest itself in real time and sputters in a numbness of frustration. If only I could program myself like a robot.

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Returning phone calls

When we got back from swimming and ice cream, I saw the voice mail light flashing. I checked the missed call, and it was my brother. I am rarely in the mood to talk to him, and I was too tired at that point regardless of my opinion of him.

When I was getting ready for bed I got my phone from J's purse, since I gave it to her when we went swimming and it was locked in a locker while we were at the pool. My brother had called my cell as well, so I sent him a text saying I will call when I have time. He lives three time zones away, so he may have been up, but I still wasn't in the mood to talk.

Today being the next day, K & B went to swim class with J this morning. I stayed home to grout. I did as much as I could before they came home at which time we went to Steak'N Shake. Kids eat free on Saturday, and I was hankering for the Chili Frito Double Steak Burger.

When we got there, the manager promised not to bus our table while we visited the Claw Machine. Claw Machine looked too tempting to give, but it didn't though we spent more than I would have liked.

Food took a while to get to us. Not sure what held up the order, but it was worth the wait. I love the Frito Burger, and hope that it returns to the menu rather than hoping for them to have Fritos leftover. They ring it up as the Jalapeno Crunch, which suggests that I like the Jalapeno Crunch, BUT I DON'T.

Anyways, we went to Wal-mart to get some items that TARGET STOPPED CARRYING. B wanted carried, and I was fine doing so until I felt my feet hurt.

Seems that I grout on my knees and toes, so I stretched my feet to a painful afterthought, just as my hands hurt from scraping.

Got back from Wal-mart and eventually got back to grouting. Upon finishing the floor, I cleaned up my mess and called my brother back. I don't recall the last time I called him. I dislike his voice, so I generally text him if communicating with him cannot be avoided.

Wasn't too bad of a call. Felt a little bad that I didn't know he was hit by a car while riding his bicycle a few weeks ago. I hadn't talked to him since he was in Ohio in April. He didn't call B on her birthday a couple weeks before his accident, which annoyed me.I don't talk to my parents much, but I talk to them more with it being baseball season. Never talk about my brother with them aside from when he's going to a show or Ohio.  My parents didn't mention it, and they saw him last week in New York at his opening there.

Personally, I think his being hit is Karma.


Saturday, June 9, 2012

Praise from the in-laws

K&B were picked up by the in-laws for a family gathering J couldn't attend, so they got to see the progress made on the kitchen. They commented that it looked good and that I could have done it sooner.












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