Crossroads of sorts

I don't blog much these days. Time isn't as free with my youngest being free range and my general lack of sleep makes spare time be more inclined towards fixing it.
Baseball has been a bane of my free time, and bad events for my team have made me feel like putting the thoughts aside like I did with football and hockey. I still follow the latter two but not as daily and more towards  pivotal playoff times.
I finished Richard Zacks book about Mark Twain going abroad in an attempt to make money to settle his debts. The book was good, but it was slow for my attention to detail is such. I feel guilty having debt, and I want to rid myself of the bad sorts that keep rolling over.
I also feel overweight. When I started working at the carwash I lost a bit of weight from being active, somehow I gained the weight back and some.
I know mostly how, actually.

1. I invented a meal that's like a dinner/lunch when I get home from work. I was still eating a breakfast in the morning but have ceased on days I wake on a fuller belly. 
2. My work isn't as hard as it used to be. I have 5 hours to do what I used to do in 4.
3. My older kids don't like to be outside, so I have to walk with D when they are at school or when J is okay with me wandering about.

Those are the key reasons. There are more but I can't tease out what exactly.
I've a lot of projects to do, I have two main ones:

1. Bathroom needs new walls, floor, and light
2. Deck needs cleaned and stained

I have most of the stuff, I just need time to do it.  J will help, I guess.
Summer has been a bummer. I'm not organized and the kids don't like other kids enough to leave the house. Well, the oldest doesn't while middle one isn't sure when people are home or such and I'm not calling cell phones to set up a play date, yet.
I've found myself fantasizing about solar power as displayed in the Harbor Freight ads. I don't have money, time, or know how to do it, hence it's a fantasy.
My youngest doesn't talk. Scary that a 2 and half old doesn't say words like "no" or anything beside "yup" or "dadda." Been doing things with HELP ME GROW, but 6 months hasn't shown much progress.
Hopefully I get the motivation to do stuff that I need done.
Hopefully the stars align and make everything seem simple.
I'm not complaining. I'm just not free to do what I want without feeling guilt of some sort. I just need my priorities to dictate my day better and to straighten out my priorities before doing anything like blogging another word.