Gaydar and other thoughts

I like watching The Flash, Gotham, and Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., but not The Arrow. The latter has been around the longest, so maybe it jumped the shark by the time I first caught it.
I have a number of reasons for disliking The Arrow, but I mostly dislike the acting. Roy Harper just seems too gay to be in a relationship with a woman. It's something I never thought much about beyond it being bad acting given the, at times, cheesy soaplike elements of the show, until I saw Colton Haynes dressed as Ursula.

I live under a rock so I know little about celebrities, like Jeff Goldblum being married to a former Olympian about half his age, so I had to google Haynes' name to make sure it was who I thought. I wasn't surprised by certain things.
Does 'gaydar" exist? Something about Roy Harper seeming gay to me, and his being played by a gay actor is probably a coincidence, but it begs the question.
I know it's not PC and I hate thinking in terms of stereotypes, but I have a hard time understanding the existence of homosexuals as a natural order of things.
I have thought of reading biographies of gays and cataloging elements of their upbringing to compare similarities, but I'm not exactly an advocate of LGBTQ studies. I just happen to be a fan of Andy Warhol and William S. Burroughs, and their gayness influenced or defined their art and interests.
Warhol was the youngest son with 2 brothers. His father was gone a lot and died from drinking contaminated water at a construction site in Wheeling, I once read. He had a close relationship with his mother. He was Catholic.

William S. Burroughs was raised by a nanny who supposedly had him suck her boyfriend's trouser monster. He, regardless of his nanny, had a close relationship with his mother. Saw his father sparingly. Gun nut.