Revisionist

Being from a small town, I had no idea what to do with myself. I just wanted to leave the small town.

I went to college and was mostly miserable. I really had no desire to do anything, but I felt obligated to go.

I was probably depressed. I looked forward to being done one day, but I figured each day brought me closer, so I might as well take each day in stride.

I was probably lonely. Being lonely is a horrible feeling. People do stupid things to avoid being lonely. It's hard to find people with whom you could settle down and cease being lonely.

Vonnegut's Slapstick should be a real thing in the sense that ridding the world of loneliness would be an amazing thing, as long as there are still people existing. Nuking humans into extinction would end loneliness but everything worthwhile would cease as well.

Anyways, I had no idea what I wanted to do with myself. My parents weren't helpful in exposing me to anything worthwhile, so I took the first job that was handed to me and became the job. 

Work study jobs are easy and don't pay much. I took it seriously. I'm the sort of person who takes things seriously, or at least as an extension of myself. 

My work ethic is not normal. I need to be busy or I get mad about being bored. I used to read a lot while on my boring jobs that had nothing else task wise for me to do.

I guess the only thing I enjoyed doing at the time was writing. I used to escape how I felt trapped with words with people doing things.  The characters weren't developed, so I figured I'd get back to it whenever I had more life experience. I needed a day job and I pursued pharmacy when I started going OSU. 

A friend of mine thought I based my post high school life on Vonnegut's Deadeye Dick. Weirdly, I read that book after I chose my first major and such. I read everything Vonnegut at one point in time, but all of it came after I graduated HS.

I've not seen a lot of people over the years, and I don't care to have contact with them. I've probably changed in my views of the world in that I have a family of my own and all of the trappings that come with it.

I need new friends.

There's got to be a better way to have people find others than whatever is being used now because Social Media is probably causing more trouble than not. I fear social media is replacing whatever we had as artificial extended families.