Sunday, February 22, 2015

not a mourning person

not sure how to go about feeling. sad blah is current phase. was cold blah earlier. also feeling bleachy. i got some on my arm and i can smell it when i inhale. both burn. arm is more of an itch than burn, but like how rug burn itches.
I'm tired of the indoor rain at work. pipes burst, but this one is rain like.
not sure how i feel about sports.
not sure i like living close to the hospital that killed my dad with its grilled cheese sandwich. i feel like i should visit him there when i drive home past said hospital. of course, hes not there. hes at funeral home. not sure what hes doing until he gets cremated, but i saw him after we made arrangements. wasn't expecting them to pick him up so quickly. mom  just picked the funeral home because she saw it while i drove her in town earlier in the week.
i feel weird using the asus tablet she bought my dad when he was in rehab, but she doesn't need it and we will use it.
seems like she knew he was dying... she offered the tablet a week ago, but i think she is still overwhelmed at his passing.
he'd been "dying" since 2001. horrible illness, CIDP is. I'm glad hes not suffering anymore. but I'm sad for my mom.

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